Marine Squadmates – Denies the enemy the fact of seeing you crawl out on your hands and knees. Instead they help you walk out, holding
Nobody Listens To Me – Until I fart…
Wall Of Death – Full throttle until you see God. Then brake.
Baseball – The sport that brings us the phrases “sliding into home”, “foul ball”, “sacrifice fly” and “the 7th inning stretch”
Imagination – Use it.
Too Cool! – Meet the man all men want to be.
A Drunk Mans Words – Are a sober mans thoughts …
Satisfied – The day I realized I was God was when I was praying to him, and realized i was talking to myself.
Iron Man – Is a super hero. IRON WOMAN is a command.
Yes – I can drive a stick.
Bad Luck – It sucks and not in a good way.
Dear Math – Stop asking us to find your X. She’s not coming back and don’t ask Y either.
The Great Recession – It’s hitting EVERYONE.
C4 Bunnies – Suicide Bombing has never been this cute.
E=mc² – Relative to this space at this point in time.
The Truth – That makes people free, is the truth which they don’t want to hear.
Mushrooms – All can be eaten, but some of them only once in a lifetime…
Rules For A Gunfight – Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your friend who have guns.
Walking Away – I don’t run away from you, I walk slowly, and it kills me you don’t care enough to stop me.
Honor Guys – The difference between the good guys and the bad guys is whether they use human shields or make themselves human shields.
Marriage & Banks – They both carry penalties for early withdrawal and depositing in another account.
Skydiving! – The safe way to do it.
Mother Nature – Shes got ghetto booty.
Wearing The Pants – I do what i want, how i want and when i want to do it. As long as i ask my
Diet Water -Now with fewer calories!
You Know You’re A Redneck – When you wear a pair of underpants as a tank top.