Vulcan mind meld – You’re doing it right.
Strong And Black – It’s how this captain takes his coffee.
Well… That’s the circle of life bro.
Jersy Shore – How it began.
Marking Your Territory – More women need to do it.
Statutory Rape – Or just a moose demeanor?
Because When You Gotta Go – Nothing else matters.
1 HOUR A DAY – Is only 4% of your ENTIRE Day…. GET IT?
I ONLY HAVE ONE NERVE – And you’re getting on it.
Alcohol – Is Not The Answer… Wait… What was the damn question?
CONTRACEPTION – Does ugly count? It is decidedly so.
THE TRUTH HURTS – No one checks the supply… Until it’s too late.
NO THANKS – I’ve just lost my appetite!!
REALISTIC TATTOOS – Though appealing, be prepared to get ran from or slapped in the neck a lot.
SOME DAYS… – It doesn’t pay to get out of bed !
WHY DOES WINTER SUCK SO MUCH? – Then again, with the Curse of a Permanent Double Facepalm, Everything in the World kinda sucks for me.
Irish Yoga – Practiced World-Wide.
RETIREMENT – How are you planning for yours ?
GOOD PARENTING – The secret is to get your priorities in order.
SOCIAL ACTIVISTS – If you postin’ ’bout Kony I feel bad for you son, he snatched 99 kids and your status saved none.
INGENUITY – Making things more interesting every step of the way.
I GAVE HER MY HEART – Now I have nothing.
News Flash – Salt water destroys Ninja cloaking powers.
An Argument – Between these two, would be priceless.
THE KEEPER – Mess her head up before you mess her bed up and she will never be fed up.
DEPRESSION – I wanted to be a Kodiak Bear Ten feet tall… a half ton of savage splendor…. Not something that looks like a Beanie