Oh Wow! – Where’d you get that totally killer tat?
Al Capone – A smile will get you pretty far, but a smile and a gun will get you farther.
Jeep-Ortunities – Driving over something, just because you can.
Mr. Clean – I Believe the floor is clean enough to eat off now.
In God We Trust – One Benjamin at a time.
I Don’t Know Karate – But I definitely know crazy and I am not afraid to use it.
Realization – When all your dreams go up in smoke, just remember who it was that lit the fire.
Hitler Kitty – We must find and eliminate all mice.
College – Has the bast Christmas trees.
Why Do I Always Lose Them? – I thought I finally made some friends, but I left them behind. It’s no one’s fault but mine.
Inside Jokes – Telling your wife that she looks the same as she did 20 years ago might seem like a compliment to her, but
Special Forces – All the cool countries have them.
Prisoners – We are not prisoners of Fate… Only prisoners of our Mind.
My Daughters Date – Suddenly I Miss The Days She Liked Justin Bieber.
Serenity – Burn the Land, Boil the Sea; You can’t take the sky from me.
Trust – Equal parts faith and hope that the universe is not about to screw you over.
Any Drugs, Alcohol Or Weapons? – No thank you officer, we have everything we need.
Albert Einstein – I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and
Neck Exercises For Men – If any of these exercises makes you feel uncomfortable or dizzy, slow down.
Summertime – When the bounties of the season are ripe for the picking but always seem to be someone else s property.
“PHOTOS (1,069)” – For some reason, I don’t want to see any of them.
Signs – For those without sense of any kind.
What Now? – You stupid hillbilly.
Optical Illusions – Great for throwing drunk people off.
Warning For Older Men
Shopping For Car Insurance Is Like Shopping For Diapers – They make lots of promises… You pay more for it than you should… And eventually you