Rednecks – You will spot them anywhere.
Global Warming – Yeah, it’s gonna be that drastic.
Having A Bad Day – Don’t worry that’s when we go come to the rescue.
Denial – Seriously? You’re still going to say you don’t have a drinking problem?
Time Warp – It’s just a jump to the left, and a step to the riiiiiiight.
Woman Wisdom – How to get rid of your husband on weekends.
Duct Tape – Helping out with stupidity since 1942.
What The Difference – Between a golf ball and a G-Spot? A man will look for a golf ball.
Rookie Mistake – Letting the wife park the car.
The Light Is Brightest – Only When the Shadow is Darkest …
Marriage – It is so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Divorce – Instead of getting married, just find a woman you don’t like and give her a house.
Tools – A man will be happy with a lot of tools. A woman will need just one, if it is the right size and properly
Totally Unrealistic – Superwoman wouldn’t need glasses …
Cat Love – I missed you too.
Bedtime Fairy Tales – Like the regular fairy tales. Only for adults.
Contact Sports – Your mom warned you to stick to tennis. But did you listen?
Ambition – Aspire to Climb As High As You Can Dream … … Those Who Belittle You Are Only Jealous Or Realists …
Last Christmas – I gave my mother-in-law a coffin. The next year I didn’t give her anything. She asked why and I said “you didn’t use
Women – They don’t want to hear a man’s opinion. They just want to hear their own In a deeper voice.
Sing – Like No One Is Listening.
Male Life – Ain’t no happiness nowhere.
Oh Crap – It is quite evident at this point that I am totally screwed.
Traffic Ticket – What’s that? You didn’t think we give pretty women ticket? Well, you’re right, we don’t.
Time – Keeps on slippin’ into the future.
Perfect Man – An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.