Castaway

Castaway: Maybe next time when you and your seal friends are bored you wont suggest going to the club.

Beauty

Beauty: The best and the most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.

3 Biggest Lies Of Texas

3 Biggest Lies of Texas – 1. I want this buckle in the rodeo 2. The truck is paid for. 3. I was just helping

Babysitting

Babysitting – I should have learned to fish, these kids nowdays have no respect.

Awesome

Awesome – Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.

Aussie marines

Aussie Marines Storming The Beach – a job well done mates, except for one small detail. You just invaded Kauai

Apophenia

Apophenia – The very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common, Instead of altering their views to the fit the facts, thy

Any Ideas?

Any Ideas? – Subliminal messages in the produce section.

Anger

ANGER – Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else: you are someone who

Alaska Girls

Alaska – We don’t Have this, But we hear good things.

Artists

Artists – A happy man may be a successful bishop, dog-catcher, actor or sausage-monger but no happy man ever produced a first-rate painting, sculpture, piece

Wave Rider

Wave rider – Break into me like wet waves on sand spasming, shock-shelled, guided by your hand… I Am surrounded by waves. Constantly crashing, submerging

Bomb Squad Prank

Bomb Squad Prank – You know after he’s done shitting himself, he’s going to beat the shit out you.

The Basement

The Basement – I’ll give you a dollar if you go first.

Bunny

Bunny – He will destroy you and feast on your soul.

Improvisation

Improvisation – Because, damnit, there’s always room for one more.

Girl Scouts

Girl Scouts – Because next time, you’ll just buy the damn cookies.

Florida Law

In Florida, molesting alligators is against state law. Everywhere else, it’s just stupid.